Hollow and Alone

So many people don’t care about each other and are hollow from isolation, yet this is a self-sustaining paradox. So often invisible. I see it very clearly, I see I could become hollow too. I don’t want to continue the cycle.

I’ve discovered, when old archaic illusions finally crumble, that doing nothing is a profound and shockingly painful choice- a pain that feels like unwilling death; a noble sacrifice quietly when instead you could be doing something toxic or evil.

Imagine if I were one less person leaving that imprint. A unique fingerprint that shows me as its author, author of spreading infectious harm and tragedy. I don’t have to do it again.

I keep looking around and the majority of both tragic and toxically destructive situations are caused by series of terrible, and blind decisions by regular people. I’ve yet to find evidence of willful evil, where someone would do it for its own sake. Even revenge has another motive; desperation for empathy – to feel their pain.

Gateways have remained pristine and closed; I will have to find another path. Maybe a path of letting go.

♦ ♣ ♦

An image captured my soul again;
it sold me to a demon I called my only friend
which tore out my heart and ripped me apart;
I said everything is as it should be
everything is as it should be

everything is as it will be,
in the end

Nemo | 7 May 2018

Prajna: Pain and Fear As Your Friend

My ego can feel like almost entirely addictiveness, and it’s a prison. I realized today after getting hooked into that prison again, in my case the prison of computer addiction, that I would rather be in a “real” prison, physically, than to be in this prison within my body and deterministic reactions. What a terrifying recognition, a kind of fear that feels like love and honesty, that allows me to fall apart. Pema feels like a long time friend, who reminds me of gratitude.

Now is the best time to surrender, to surrender again and be present. Sometimes, this is called meditation.

Jordan Peterson and Youth Rights | Ch. 5 Deep Dive

Books Referenced:
12 Rules for Life by Dr. Jordan B. Peterson
The Conscious Parent by Shefali Tsabary
Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn
Free to Learn by Dr. Peter Gray

This article corresponds with the video but is not a verbatim transcript. For timestamps see the time [0:00] at the top of each section throughout the article. Resources are linked chronologically throughout the piece. Additional resources not mentioned in the video are included chronologically and a full list is at the bottom.
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Willpowerful: Independence in Adolescence

Willpowerful: Independence in Adolescence – Updated February 2019!
Regular PDF   • Printable Booklet

It only takes $1 to keep distributing copies- all proceeds go to cost of production and outreach.

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Special thanks to Chase Gielda of OAM Meditation for thoroughly reviewing and editing Willpowerful. His contributions were significant in setting a direction for Willpowerful and widening the audience that can be reached, yet tailoring specifically to those audiences.

Willpowerful: Independence in Adolescence
Regular PDF   • Printable Booklet


If you are a young person dreaming of the freedom to lead your own life, this guide can help. In this guide, wecelebrate the human will for independence. Yes, you are young, and yes- you have the right to own your life.

With determination and dedication, you have the chance to be free. You could be a leader in youth rights, if you step up to the challenge.

This booklet is licensed under Creative Commons – Attribution. The most current publication is attributed to Nemo Sundry.
What’s New in the Update?
The new update’s primary changes are in the writing. We’ve replaced filler story with more pragmatic advice and laid it out step by step, especially experiences that aren’t obvious or transparent. We adjusted the language so it would make the most sense to the young people reading it, and connect with their real and evolving experiences. In focusing mostly on pragmatic advice, the final version is able to provide multiple examples to address choices relevant at younger ages, roughly 12-16, and as a person gets older, around 16-21. But autonomy (independence) is a universal need, so at whatever age a person begins the path, there’s something in Willpowerful for them. Cheers!
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The State Within: A Year in the Free State Project

In August of 2016 I moved to New Hampshire for the Free State Project, and the year I spent there destroyed me, I was anihilated and reborn many times. In this experience I saw the transmutation and meditation practices I’d commited to for 6 months had profoundly impacted my intrinsic strength in response to what became the worst situation of my adult life. It is in this transformation that I came to a fundamental understanding of the kinds of skills, priorities and values that freestaters absolutely need for this movement to be successful.
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The Alchemy Meditation

Presence | Recognition | Acceptance | Dedication | Playfulness | Gratitude

“So this is a basic tonglen logic: When you feel the discomfort, have the thought: ‘Other people feel this.’ And then if you want to take it a rather dramatic step further, you can say, ‘May we all be free of this’…And the most dramatic and probably most difficult step is to say: ‘Since I’m feeling this anyway, may I be feeling it so all others could be free of it.'” – Pema Chödrön on Tonglen meditation

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Awaken Through Homelessness

“Home is where the heart is.”

Home is not in the world somewhere. It is cultivated within you. If you build a home in the world, attachments and aversion to it must be abandoned, before the roots of home can take hold in your heart. This is called awakening through homelessness- a manifesto of taking on the transparent reality of nature, to recognize the nature of reality.

Home within rests on your consciousness embracing of the present moment. To refuse the temptation of a false house or safe space is to dedicate to the experience of homelessness, until the true home of presence and acceptance arises from within.

To put it otherwise, you will be groundless in your vulnerability until you accept vulnerability as true ground.